Wedding ceremony is some event newlyweds are looking forward to. Not less would their guests look forward to a great opportunity to congratulate the young on that serious step they take. And the bride and the groom ask themselves not only what to do if they would like to avoid unnecessary or, what is worse, similar gifts like kitchenware, bedding, and ornaments, but they wonder how to ask for money as a wedding gift.
Does there exist any etiquette on the issue how to ask for money instead of wedding gifts, how to express this idea in wedding invitation gift wording and whom this idea shall come from the honorees or the guests? Let’s consider as a matter of priority why the question of how to ask for money as a wedding gift arises.
Traditionally the guests determine themselves what wedding present they consider to be appropriate. There are several factors which are significant. First, it depends on your budget and your relationships. Even if you are a poor student, it doesn’t mean you are unwanted as a guest, you may turn to be a childhood friend of the groom. But your poor finance may mean you may not afford expensive presents. Second, many people, especially those who are already married, believe that there are some things every household may need such as pans and dishes.
What else makes this question ‘How to ask for money instead of wedding gifts’ actual is the fact that tastes differ, and whatever may be a cute and adorable present for a 35-year-old lady with three children could be absolutely unacceptable, unnecessary or even offensive for honeymooners. Since we mentioned it, honeymoon is a very expensive pleasure, as usual, that demands personal savings. Sometimes the couple are going to make a wedding ceremony luxurious and spend their honeymoon in a gorgeous place. It’s great luck when they do not need to choose. But in case they are compelled to do it, they should save a penny, consider all the articles of expenditure, cut the number of guests and refuse from live flowers… or an expensive honeymoon.
Flowers seem to be a magnificent gift if received in time. But if the couple gets lots of bouquets that may die soon and they are going to leave for Spain the next day, this, surely, seems to be a waste of money. Why not ask for cash as a wedding gift and prevent all these spendings? The idea is cool, but many people doubt if to bring money gifts is acceptable or could be viewed as a lack of human attention. Not to mention many controversial views of the couple themselves. How to ask for money for wedding gifts tactfully? Will the guests perceive such a request adequately? Won’t they consider it to be manipulation?
At first glance, the answer seems to be on the surface. The point is many contemporary people still believe wedding gifts shall be memorable. In case you have a joint fund, who will estimate how huge your contribution is? Is it appropriate to give cash as a wedding gift? How much money to give to newlyweds? Is it going to be a gift from you personally or from a collective or a family, maybe? Shall you prepare a money envelope or openly demonstrate how big the sum of money you are going to present is? All these doubts could be easily eliminated by appropriate wedding monetary gift wording. Certainly, some etiquette rules shall be followed. But if that obsessive idea how to ask for monetary gifts for wedding keeps the bride awake, it’s better to find some way to please her.
You know, times have changed. Many people do not want to rush headlong into searching wedding gifts and waste both time and money when they know that the bride and the groom will be happy to get monetary wedding gifts. The question is how to make everybody feel comfortable: the newlyweds should know how to ask for cash for the wedding gift tactfully and politely, and the guests should accept this idea as natural as possible.
Therefore, appropriate wording for money gifts’ request is rather essential. Remember to tell your guests how special they are to you and mention the fact that you are really proud of them attending your special day. Some prompt in your wedding invitation (that you would prefer cash to wedding gifts) could take the form of a joke or a poem. Try not to put pressure on your guests, anyway. They shall be given options to choose and shall not feel being manipulated or deceived.
Informing the attendees about your plans for the funds (honeymoon or home improvements) is obligatory. Many people are prejudiced against cash for wedding gifts because they think the just married will squander whatever they gain or will try to cover wedding ceremony expenses. Remember to send all your guests a note of appreciation for their attendance and gifts, which will also serve a lovely reminder of your big day.
Wedding invitation gift wording
Here are some samples of wedding invitation gift wording that may be helpful. If your invitations are customized and tactful, your guests will be eager to grant you your deep desire. In any case, the wedding invitation gift wording is rather significant for the first impression. So, be honest, but respectful!
With all that we have, we’ve been truly blessed.
Your presence and prayers are all that we request.
But if you desire to give nonetheless,
Monetary gift is one we suggest.
If you were thinking of giving a gift to help us in our way,
A gift of cash towards our house would really make our day.
However, if you prefer to purchase a gift,
Feel free to surprise us in your own way.
To save you looking, shipping and buying,
Here’s an idea we hope you like trying!
A wishing well we thought would be great,
But only if you wish to participate.
A card with some money is placed in the well,
Then make a wish… but don’t tell!
If the guests gladly accept the idea of monetary gifts it’s wise to think about formal details. Many people choose to hand out finances in an envelope. The idea is conventional, but not bad. Handmade or vintage, unique or custom, wedding money envelopes are numerous and various, many alternatives are offered.
Cash envelopes shall be signed. It doesn’t mean any measuring contest. It is simply polite to demonstrate your personal attitude towards the couple. And even if donor ‘s personal budget is not so big and his or her monetary gift is rather small being equal to the sum of 50 or 100 dollars, this information will be kept secret, as a rule, if he or she wants it, surely. As a matter of fact, some responsible and trustworthy person shall collect all envelopes, for no money to be lost or stolen.
What concerns some big donations, usually coming from close relatives, parents, for example, they shall be thanked in public. A giant check printout could impress everybody and make the event memorable! And later on, in a quiet and calm environment a sponsor could hand to young spouses a real check with a solid amount.
In fact, many factors affect what monetary gift a person will give. First, it depends on what kind of relationships you have: are you a friend, brother, colleague, friend or neighbor, how long have you known the couple and, certainly, how close are you. Second, the amount of cash the guests are ready to part with may be determined by their living style, their regular expenses and even the locality they have come from.
Travel costs may be quite high, you know. 100 – 150 dollars/ euro is quite an acceptable sum of money if you are a relative or a friend of the bride or the groom. 30 – 100 dollars/ euro as a gift for the wedding is quite enough if you have average earnings and you are a distant family member, an employee, or an accidentally invited guest. But wealthy people can afford gifts of any amount dependent only on their own generosity, not determined by their connections with the couple.
If your cash gift is going to be collective, consider how many people it will be, from the family or couple. The amount you give should be proportional to the number of people contributing a share in the gift.
Money jar is another traditional way to give money to a wedding. It could either be a good idea for an individual present or a way to collect money from all the guests. In the former case try not to torture the spouses with counting coins and exchanging them for bills. In the latter case choose a bigger jar to contain all the funds raised. Consider dollhouses, balloons or money pies as other alternative ideas available.
We hope all the wedding funding will be used for its intended purpose!